Quick Shots

Hi there, Scott from 2018 writing here. This is from my old Xanga account. I mostly post these because it makes me laugh at myself. I have no idea why you’d be reading this, but enjoy yourself. -SP

Since I don’t really have the time to write entries for the foreseeable future, I’ll write a few little bits about my life as of late.

  • I didn’t get the job in St. Louis. I interviewed on Monday for a job in Chicago. Should hear back about that one soon.
  • Allison recently signed me up for complimentary issues of magazines “they’re sure to enjoy” as the offer described it. As such, I’ve had the delight of getting free issues of the magazines *hild, 2 back-to-back issues of Golf Digest, ESPN: The Magazine, and the star of the collection, ELLEgirl. After giving the last zine a bad rap, where I may have called for the assassination of a 15-year-old actress for appearing on the cover, I’ve turned over a new leaf and have given the magazine a delightful second chance. While it lacks a proper teenie “Is he crushin’ on you? 15 questions to find out!” quiz, it still gets high marks for a variety of funny moments. A 13 year old girl writes: (note this is not edited or abridged in any way)

Thank you for “Wood You Rather?” I’ve liked Elijah Wood since the Lord of the Rings trilogy came out. He’s such a hot, awesome, and talented actor! I can’t wait for his new movie! I didn’t know he had 3,000 CDs… whoa, that’s a lot.

Somehow, the editors of the magazine failed to comment on this controversial viewpoint. My favorite though is when a 19 year old (And who over the age of 14 reads ELLEgirl? WHO?!) writes to ask a celebrity: “Do you watch The OC?” That’s it. A letter and months of waiting to get the answer to that. Anyhoo, it’s fun times.

  • On a mildly serious note, if I hear any more phrases like “You don’t understand this? It’s straightforward,” “… always the model of the ideal grad student, you are,” or “You seem like a better fit for the business world,” , I think I’m going to start biting off heads. So be warned if you see me get out a file and start sharpening my teeth. Head-biting will be eminent.
  • On a whim, I applied with these people for a job teaching English as a Second Language in South Korea for a year, while I was applying for a rash of interesting jobs. Well, I heard back from them today, and they’re wanting an interview. Very interesting.
  • Finally, I can’t stop watching World Championship Sexy (low quality, but what can you do?). It reminds me of good ol’ Sprockets in its zaniness. I keep saying “Okay chubbies, your time is now,” and imagining John Leguizamo’s clown from Spawn saying “Sexual.”Also worth checking out is one of their older film school presentations that make me realize I wasted my previous time as an undergrad. Incidentally, the people behind this are also, along with my hero Bob Odenkirk, the people behind the new Adult Swim show Tom Goes to the Mayor, as well as my favorite all-digital phone service.